I turned 20!

This is Me & Amita at Econfina:

Our canoe said Discovery 69, lawls:

This is me & Julie going to play in the water:

Me probz being a smart ass:

My 20th birthday is June 3rd!

BUY ME THESE!?:

All of these from ModCloth.com

FROM HERITAGE1981
AND FOREVER21.COM

OF COURSE - DELIA*S.COM

The Con

I listened in, Yes I'm guilty of this. You should know this I broke down and wrote you back Before you had a chance toForget forgotten. I am moving past this giving notice. I have to go. Yes I know the feeling, Know you're leaving. Calm down, I'm calling you to say I'm capsized, erring on the edge of safe. Calm down, I'm calling back to say I'm home now. I'm coming around, coming around. Nobody likes to but I really like to cry. Nobody likes me, Maybe if I cry.
Spelled out your name and lists the reasons, Pain of heart. Don't call me back. I imagine you when I was distant, Non-insistent, I follow suit and laid out on my back. Imagine that.

A million hours left to think of you And think of that. Calm down, I'm calling you to say I'm capsized, erring on the edge of safe. Calm down, I'm calling back to say I'm home now And coming around, coming around. Nobody likes to but I really like to cry. Nobody likes me, Maybe if I cry.
Encircle me, I need to be, taken down.

Lullaby

It's those pills that you don't need to take,medicating perfection, now that's a mistake. I know that you're spent, just let me sing you to sleep. It's your finger and how I'm wrapped around it. It's your grace and how it keeps me grounded. I know that you're weak, just let me sing you to sleep. If you need anything, just the say the word. I mean anything. Rest assured, if you start to doze, then I'll tuck you in, Plant my lips where your necklaces close.

I abhor you.

This city sleeps in flames.

I don't care what you said I won't sink in the flood But I listen to every noise That you make and make sense of what you say And I take note to every sound We're not the same again Don't you dare insinuate me You don't care what you create You can't swim in this flood And you'll swallow with every wave That comes by and take take what you need You'll still swallow with every tide We're not the same again Don't you dare insinuate me To hell with that!

I'm still alive.

I'm still moving forward. I'm still breathing. I'm still smiling on my own.
I'm still forgetting.
I'm still doing my thing. I'm still in love with someone who treats me like a queen.



I bet you're really pissed off now.

If you be my star I'll be your sky you can hide underneath me and come out at night when I turn jet black and you show off your light I live to let you shine I live to let you shine but you can skyrocket away from me and never come back if you find another galaxy far from here with more room to fly just leave me your stardust to remember you by if you be my boat I'll be your sea a depth of pure blue just to probe curiosity ebbing and flowing and pushed by a breeze I live to make you free I live to make you free but you can set sail to the west if you want to and past the horizon till I can't even see you far from here where the beaches are wide just leave me your wake to remember you by if you be my star I'll be your sky you can hide underneath me and come out at night when I turn jet black and you show off your light I live to let you shine I live to let you shine but you can skyrocket away from me and never come back if you find another galaxy far from here with more room to fly just leave me your stardust to remember you by stardust to remember you by

Stay.

I feel like I've finally found the kind of love that writers create romance novels over, some of the things that we share could sell a hit book... or at least give directors a shot to shoot a Grammy award winning movie on, maybe an artist to sell #1 song on the billboard charts. I just think that when I look at you that no one else has ever seen anyone or anything the same way that I see you. You evoke so much passion and love in me that at times it leaves me completely breathless. I want to keep it this way.

Don't leave yet, it's still early and I haven't even said a word.

and I'm hoping that I might upset you by saying what I want to

'cause it's not like you don't know I've fallen for...

it's in my head and that's where you can't see it.

and I thought that maybe if I had to bite the tips of my fingers,

I could stumble over words and tell you

just how far before I hit the ground.

and I'm the type to think of all the wrong things to say,

and I will shut myself up and I'll never come out-

I'll close all my doors and only show you

the black spots where my eyes once were.

I can say this- I can say this- I can say this-

I can collect myself down-

come out punching and screaming out loud.

2008 in style!

This bitch right here is getting drunk alone tonight!
WIN!

Polygraph, right now.

Fate is an elegant, cold-hearted whore
She loves salting my wounds
Yes, she enjoys nothing more
I bleed confidence from deep within my guts now
I'm the king of this pity party with my jewel encrusted crown

Peace out 2007.

This year has had ups & downs, just like every other year before. I mean, shit, I've really accomplished a lot this year. I paid my bills on time for the most part, I got my diploma. I popped out one amazing baby girl!, I got a car, credit card, & a drivers liscense, I moved to Florda ... then back to Atlanta ... then back to Florida again, I turned 19 years old, I got pulled over for the very first time, and uh.. yeah, I'm getting a divorce. Pretty eventful year, if I do say so myself. Though I am very happy to see it go. Onto better and brighter days, I hope.

Head over Heels.

If one more person picks on me about my weight
I am going to go all columbine over here.

All the good that won't come out.

I do this thing where I think I'm real sick but I won't go to the doctor to find out about it. Cause they make you stay real still in a real small space As they chart up your insides and put them on display. They'd see all of it, all of me, all of it.
All the good that won't come out of me, and all the stupid lies I hide behind. It's such a big mistake lying here in your warm embrace. Oh, you're almost home. I've been waiting for you to come in. Dancing around in your old suits going crazy in your room again.

I think I'll go out an embarrass myself by getting drunk and falling down in the street.
You say I choose sadness, that it never once has chosen me.
Maybe you're right...

This song is on repeat non-stop. It always sends shivers down my spine. I can't wait for you to write me back, it's all I'm living on. E-mail to e-mail... that's my whole life right now. And wine... gotta have a good glass of wine.

aw frig.

LOL.

19 Days

With you gone there is not much else to write about.
I miss you terribly.

21 Days.....

&I just want to sleep them away.

she buried herself in the air.

where? up there. she scurried up invisible back stairs. where? back there. and what did she do all day long? all day long, just rode along. what did she do all day long? all day long, sang silent songs. what did she do all day long? all day long, the dirge was on. what did she do all day long?

all day long: mute button on.

Thailand, Philippines, & Bangkok

You be good to my heart, or I will bomb the shit out of you. Period.


I'll miss you for all three entire weeks.
Every day, every hour, every minute, every second.
You're way more than worth this wait, you know?

I didn't think it was possible for one person to be the reason behind so many smiles. I'll be worried sick about you, but keeping you in mind constantly. I really do hope you have fun, I know you will. This will be one huge learning experience for you. I just hope you have at least one second every day to stop, think about me, & smile. I adore you, boy.